Falling into the victim trap is easy and getting yourself out of the pit is well an uphill task.
If you find yourself in a self pity or victim mode, ask yourself -
Which situations make me feel like a victim?
Take your time.
Is your answer somewhat related to things not going your way or a sense of loss of control?
Is it related to how someone else behaves with you or treats you?
Chances are that you have somehow given another person the remote to YOUR feelings. Your feelings should not be dependent on how others behave, and they should not, in any situation, be able to control your feelings. They will do that if you give them the remote.
Some call it the inner locus of control, some call it an inner scorecard. But what it essentially means is that you should do things for you, not for gathering the praises of others.
Warren Buffet put this in an interesting example - “ I feel like I’m on my back, and there’s the Sistine Chapel, and I’m painting away. I like it when people say, ‘Gee that’s a pretty good painting.’ But it’s my painting, and when somebody says, ‘Why don’t you use more red instead of blue?’ Good bye. It’s my painting. And I don’t care what they sell it for. The painting itself will never be finished. That’s one of the great things about it.”
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